Bar Tipsy

Bar Tipsy

For Thanksgiving I was able to go visit my uncle out in Littleton Colorado. I had fun for a couple of reasons. We played games and got to talk to each other. I got to meet new family that I didn't know was family until Thanksgiving day. I got to go to a bar with my new step-cousin. If you couldn't tell already from the title, I am going to talk about my bar experience.

Now I didn't go there to get drunk. I was just the designated driver for the night. I wasn't even expecting to go until my step-cousin's friend ended up asking me if I wanted to go along. I thought about it, since I have never been to a bar during normal bar hours, I decided to go and try something new.

Everything you see on television about bars is like 99% accurate.

The first bar we got to was closed, so the next one we decided to try was more of a lower class everyone-goes-to-this-bar kind of bar. Now it is Thanksgiving night, around 10 PM and we pull up. I am not sure what to expect, so I do the normal routine and pull out my id to show whom ever is at the door... No one was at the door.

This was very strange to me. After I was done looking for the doorman, I noticed a lot of people were looking in our direction. My cousin and her friend ended up pushing through to get to the bathroom. I didn't need to go so I awkwardly just stood around. I wasn't sure what to do or where to go, there were people everywhere. Eventually my cousin came back and they ordered some drinks. Rum and coke was the flavor of the night.

Before we headed to the bar, my cousin and her friend informed me that most of the people they knew from high school and most likely their parents would be there; so that was comforting to know. My cousin was pulled away multiple times to talk to people. Her friend ended up staying with me and we got to talk and try to listen to the terrible sounds coming from most of the karaoke singers.

After a while we decided to play a little pool. We first played against each other and my Cousin ended up winning this round. I was definitely not adjusting to the loud screeching from the stage where karaoke was being performed and the size of the pool table. I heard that pool tables in bars are quite a bit smaller. At work we have a tournament size table. The other thing I know is that pool balls specifically the cue ball in bars are normally a little bit bigger than standard. But I don't think that was entirely why I couldn't shoot. haha

We ended up playing a few guys in the bar. I really felt the pressure. Funny thing is that I didn't even know these guys. They didn't know where I was from or who I was, yet I felt like I needed to prove something. It might have been more for my cousin or something but regardless I had a mission. So with that I ended up trying to play the best I could. I didn't do that great. My cousin helped out a lot, but I was able to sink almost 2 balls per turn. The other guys also had some interesting strategies to which I took note of. There were many shots that I looked at and said I would hit these particular balls to break them up. However in their mind, that would give their opponent (me) an advantage to knock down other balls on the table and so they went with a safer shot of only hitting one ball even though they wouldn't make it.

We ended up winning that one. After that we had a second game to which we almost won again. They had two balls out and we were on the 8. We got there because I went on a run of three, which put us ahead. My cousin took a shot and missed, they took a shot and put down 1 ball. My turn, I take the shot and the cue ball goes straight into the pocket. It made me mad for making such a mistake but that is ok. I think I proved that I could play pool. :)

After that I don't remember a whole lot. It got to be around 12:00 or later and I was getting tired. I didn't drink anything while I was there, and I go to bed around 10:00 so I can get up for work at 5:00. I just remember sitting at the table and talking to my cousins friend about the terrible singing. After a while my cousin joined us and we began making fun of the people attempting to dance. These people were completely out of it. I am not sure if additional substances were involved.

One particular woman was out on the floor and she had her arms outstretched as if she was trying to hold on to two additional imaginary shoulders of other people lining up to do some kind of Russian dance. She did not however do a Russian dance. Nope. Instead she left her hands limp and just bounced up and down while spinning. That’s fine, what ever, but then another woman who had previously just finished screeching at the mic came up from the bar and approached the bouncing gal. Let's for clarity sake, call the bouncing gal Jordan and the new woman Tiffany. Jordan was wearing a scarf to which Tiffany took a hold of and starting waving the two ends up and down that went with the rhythm that Jordan was performing.

While this was going on, some scruffy looking guy came onto the dance floor. He then proceeded to dribble an invisible basketball. My mind was now blown. Basketball is a dance form according to this guy. Oh man he was good. He could go through his own legs, and Jordan’s legs after a brief 3 second delay to what he had done he went to go retrieve the ball that bounced through Jordan’s legs. This was terrible to watch, but it was the only thing happening so we continued watching for most of the night.

The dancing eventually ended and a cowboy jumped onto the stage. Oh boy... Yeah, drunk and cowboy didn't work for this guy. The best part out of his singing was Jordan decided to jump on the stage and grab the second mic, which was not on, and hang on the pole with her drink while mindlessly dazing off into the lights above. The guy singing glanced back on several occasions to figure out what she was doing.

Absolutely nothing...

I missed this part but my cousin said that she ended up dropping her drink and it landed flat on the ground. The fantastic part about beer glass is that it does a great job at landing on a surface and rocketing everything out of that glass straight up into the rafters. She then darted off the stage and took only the glass with her. She left the straw and ice on the stage to which the karaoke host brushed to the back.

You might think that was the end of the stories. Oh no my friend, let's continue.

Jordan was the best entertainment at the bar that night. There was a fan that had a light chain just in reach of this woman. Like a child she grabbed the chain, pulled, heard the click and released with out letting the tension out of the chain. Much like the beer, the chain shot up to the fan. All I thought at that moment was, "Well this is how a bar gets broken. Some drunken person gets a fan chain suck in the motor and the whole thing goes up in flames."

Luckily that didn't happen.

What happened next was a rather drunk and stumbling guy came out to save the day. He had his trusty pool stick with him. He was going to stick the pool stick into the chain loop that was visible and pull it down. All the while getting rather close to the spinning blades of the fan.

The moral of the story is that this could have been so much more entertaining. There was so many things that could have went wrong but didn't. I blame the boos that were served, they were not strong enough! haha

Well it was fun to say the least; I had fun playing pool and spending time with my new cousin - trying out new things and continuing to have new adventures.